28 March 2006

The World-Wide Internet

Once again proving that you can find just about anything on the Internet...
I present to you, Unicorn sex...

In other news, Hunter finally figured out that his spare car wasn't actually as dead as he once thought, so I no longer have to do battle with those evil car salesmen. That's a good thing, because they take dim views of blaster usage in these parts and many of them were getting sorely on my nerves.

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18 March 2006

All Apologies

Yikes, who knew that Earth illnesses could be so nasty?
I've been down and out for about a week with something or other.
I blame Hunter, myself...

I would have figured Vladirian liquor would have conquered it,
since it seems to do so well against a variety of other interstellar ailments.
(even if that isn't its intended use)

So, hopefully I'll be back up to speed soon.

In the meantime, leave a comment or two...

10 March 2006

Simply Amazing

You know, I haven't been around these parts long. I'm not altogether familiar with the way this planet conducts its business. I'm also not the brighest guy in the universe, but one would think this would make a person go "huh?"


04 March 2006

All About the Money

So, it would seem I'm stuck here on Earth for a while. The lack of spare parts availability in this area is unbelievable.

So, since I'm stuck here, I figured I'd probably need some sort of personal vehicle to get around, since the city I'm in has this aversion to any substantial form of public transportation.

Anyway, I went around to a few places to find something cheap (since there aren't any places around here where I can exchange galactic credits for dollars, and since I don't have a job).

I've come to the conclusion that car salesmen are simply the vilest people in the known universe(and no offense meant to those reading who may have chosen this profession). That's a pretty tough feat to achieve, considering some of the shady folks out there.

A couple of stories from my journey:

First off, it seemed to me that everywhere I went, I was greeted by someone who was brand new (they even told me so...smooth). They must have serious training in how to be a pain in the a** in car salesman school.

One such newbie walked out of the building, and I could smell him (I kid you not) from at least 10 feet away (I'm beginning to learn Earth units of measure...slowly). I'm not exactly sure why he thought it a good idea to douse himself in some sort of fragrance. On Yordley Prime, I think he'd be called bait.

So, Bait-Boy walks up and introduces himself and asks what I'm looking for. I explain it to him, at which point he asks about financing. Fortunately, Hunter has already explained the evils of this system called financing, so I explain that I will not be partaking of any financing. At this point, he asks if I'd like to come in and fill out some information for a pre-approval form.

Since I would not be partaking of financing, one has to wonder why I would need any kind of pre-approval. Do they, during this extensive salesman school training, also suck a person's brain out of their head?

Needless to say, my response (roughly close to the paragraph above, minus the brain-sucking comment) did not seem to register with him, so he quickly walked back into the building and brought out a more seasoned opponent. Even more needless to say, our attempts at searching proved futile.

A second of these salesman fiends (separate dealer) apparently did not understand the concept of cheap. He continually attempted to show me vehicles which were almost as much as buying a new vehicle. Not to mention, when bringing me before his more seasoned companion (did I also mention he was brand new?), explained how I was looking to spend around "three or four grand" when I had specifically given an amount FAR less than that.

I think the evidence is gathering for my theory of a brain-sucking session in car salesman school.
The search continues...